“As I sit around watching hero after hero, man after man, fall at the realization of their past indiscretions…

"As I sit around watching hero after hero, man after man, fall at the realization of their past indiscretions, I don't sit by and wonder 'Who will be next?'" Spurlock wrote. "I wonder, 'When will they come for me?'"

This is good news. While the behavior (words and actions) are not acceptable, admitting to them and acknowledging their effects is appropriate. As the revelations keep coming, I've been thinking about how we got here and a few thoughts come to mind.

One, I think the main reason people doubt the victim is because they can't believe that anyone, let alone an upstanding person, would do this. But the problem is, we don't realize what and how people are affected by our actions.

Two, the reality is that many of us have actually done this and not even realized we were inappropriate or made someone uncomfortable. One person's joke is another person's insult. You may not have meant any harm by it, but it can still hurt, especially if you experience it over and over again. I know I have and wish I hadn't been such an insensitive jerk not to realize what effect my "joking" may have caused.

Three, some (and I emphasize some) people feel victimised more than they were. That is, feeling pressured by your boyfriend is not the same as rape. Yes, you may have felt uncomfortable or "'forced" and while your feelings are valid, it is unfair to label it rape. Unfortunately, pressuring women under the guise of seduction has been ingrained into our collective conscience so we don't think of it as wrong, especially between couples.

There is more to say and think about but I wanted to start with the above. And to add that I'mn sorry for all the times I made someone uncomfortable by my words or actions.


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